What on Earth is the Socialist Revolutionary Army and what are they doing in my house?
Our Mission
Ever since the dawn of time, since ape transitioned to man, our collective history has been of class struggle, wars between the poor and the rich, and more commonly the rich and the rich, and even more commonly the Germans and everyone around them.
We at the Socialist Revolutionary Army seek to abolish class, privilege and prejudice in a titanic revolution which will set up a Socialist Superstate within the Great Lakes Shire, freeing its people from the capitalist yoke which stickily ensnares them.
We are willing to do anything to have our goal achieved. Climb garbage bins, make fools of ourselves in public, even eat blue vein cheese... So do not underestimate our lack of unorganisation, our lack of enthusiasm and our lack of devotion. Beneath that thin facade we are ironhard revolutionaries ready to strike the soft juicy underbelly of the capitalist state...
Our History
The Socialist Revolutionary Army, (or officially the People's Socialist Revolutionary Army Created for the Liberation of the Great Lakes Shire from Right Wing Elements) was created in late 2009, as a reaction to the increasing right wing agitation within Great Lakes College, and an increasing lack of things to do. Its purpose was to defend the interests of the newly formed Great Lakes Alliance of Democratic Young Socialists through pacifist warfare (see below).
From small beginnings the SRA quickly grew to encompass a sizable majority of the College's socialists, and took part in sabotage and vigilante attacks against capitalist and crypto-fascist elements within the school. The zenith of the SRA's power came in April 2010, when troops of the SRA's elite guard took part in an abortive uprising against ruling capitalists. Using bins as tanks, and using loud annoying slogans as our weapons, the English Faculty was siezed along with a valuable cache of chips, and the History Faculty was blockaded. With the area secured, the SRA raised the flag of socialism in the Year 10 area and preared to defend it with their lives. Unfortunately capitalist reinforcements arrived, and the SRA fell back, and dispersed into the general school population, ready to fight another day...
What is Pacifist Warfare?
To many the word 'Pacifist Warfare' may seem a contradiction in terms. It is not. Originally developed in the Vietnam War era at Melbourne University, it is a mode of warfare which only rivals true warfare in its ridiculousness and harmless grandeur.
The way the SRA interprets warfare is simple.
If the enemy is laughing at us, or is freaked out, he cannot destroy us. Therefore SRA operatives use the most ridiculous methods imaginable to win the almighty struggle against the capitalists and fascist who oppose us. Unfortunately these methods cannot be disclosed due to security reasons. But they're really really funny. You're missing a lot,